Where is my gaze?
This year I made a promise to myself that I would write more! It says something about the start to this year, that this is the first time I am actually getting around to fulfilling some of that promise.
As I write this Russia is 5 days into an invasion of Ukraine! my mind is struggling to comprehend this statement. I watch the news, I have not done this for a while, trying to fathom what the heck is going on. I feel for the people of Ukraine who hunker in basements, fighting for their freedom. It is incomprehensible.
If the sanctions being levelled against Russia stay in place, then the people of Russia too are going to suffer. In short, this action is changing the very landscape of Europe, and I am sure the ramifications will be felt for a long time to come.
Contemplation
As I contemplate this and the other struggles occurring around the world, let’s not forget the small matter of the pandemic and the resulting physical and mental suffering. The economic destruction too inflicted by Covid has been absolutely devastating. It is easy to fall into a downward spiral. One that causes you to focus on the negatives and not on the possibilities. This is my challenge.
Tomorrow will be 3 years since my mother passed away and I smile when I think about what she would have said about our latest fuel hike. It would have been something completely inappropriate and I would have had to tell her to “chill mom” Why is it that I could do this with her? Why was it easy for me to calm her angst, but not my own. It is a very weird feeling.
The world, at the moment, feels completely out of kilter. We have complete imbalance, with people increasingly turning to an inward focus, a growing sense of “I’m the most important person”. We are losing sight of those around us. While I concede that it is important to focus on your own well-being, it must not come at the expense of those around you. This is my challenge too.
Focus
I read a book by Gabi Lowe entitled “Get me to 21” about her, and her families fight, to get their daughter, Jenna, to her 21st birthday. Deep into the book I was struck by her observation of people walking around her, each dealing with their own issues. Do we know what they are dealing with? Do we want to know? Do we want to help?
So as I write this, I am not necessarily closer to solutions, perhaps that is also the answer, solution finding should not be the requirement. My resolve, for the time being, is to focus on others, try to connect where they are. I will put off my own negative thoughts about myself, my own feelings of inadequacy and I will take on the input from those around me who seek to help me. I will endeavour to connect with others, at the place that they are and try to journey with them.